Tuesday, July 10, 2007

A Happy Marriage

My brother-in-law got married last week and today I came across a post - "Why we wear wedding ring on the fourth finger". These inspired me to write this post.

According to Wikipedia, a wedding ring symbolizes marriage: a spouse wears it to indicate a marital commitment to fidelity.

"All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult."

"The first year of marriage is like wet cement - the impressions made in it are much harder to change once it has set." - Robert Wolgemuth

"Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate." - Barnett R. Brickner

"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, but always with the same person." - Mignon McLaughlin

"What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility." - George Levinger

"Ultimately the bond of all companionship, whether in marriage or in friendship, is conversation." - Oscar Wilde

"Let the wife make her husband glad to come home and let him make her sorry to see him leave." - Martin Luther

There is an advice: "It is better for a woman to marry a man who loves her than a man she loves." What do you think? Do you agree? Looking forward to hear from anybody who is willing to share his or her experience.

Photo by crystalspman taken from this source

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J@n!ce said...

Sam, you are really fast.... this is what I called an Awesome blogger. WONDERFUL :)

I am going to give something to you too for writing that post that link back to me. ;)

Wait for me....

Jennifer said...

Very nice post Sam,

This quote..."A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, but always with the same person," is one of my favorites... so, so true!

Too often couples think that if everything is going perfectly smoothly then it is time to move on.... I think a key to a successful marriage is to learn and grow from the challenges and difficulties, always with the mind and heart to deepen the love!

Thank you for this great post!


Sam Chan said...

Hi Janice,

Thanks for your nice words. Actually, I am not that really fast. I had taken a couple of hours for this post :-)

Anyway, I enjoyed preparing this post!

A link back to your blog is just my small token of appreciation to you for an inspiring post.

Thanks for your kind support and encouragement! It means a lot!

Best Wishes

Sam Chan said...

Hi Jennifer,

Thank you for your insight and wisdom!

Very very true! It is always with the mind and heart to deepen the love.

The divorce rate is still increasing everywhere! Hopefully every couples understood the needs to learn and grow from the challenges and difficulties. A better generation will be possible only if every couples stick together forever!

My Best Wishes to you

Water Learner said...

Hi Sam,

Thanks for making effort to leave a message for me to read this marvellous blog on marriage. Very apt for one that is having a big of jitters prior to tying the knot. c(",)

My humble view is that marriage is a choice to last a life time. It takes genuine effort to merge two separate lives into one. I used to laugh when I heard that couple could quarrel over squeezing the toothpaste from the top of the tube or from the bottom after marriage. I am not laughing now.

I chanced upon this morning and found the following by the reputable Thich Nhat Hanh:

"Understanding and Love are not two separate things, but just one. To develop understanding, you have to practice looking at all living beings with the eyes of compassion. When you understand, you cannot help but love. And when you love, you naturally act in a way that can relieve the suffering of people."

Of course that love that he is talking about here is more than love between two people in marriage. But I strongly believe that Love and Understanding cannot be separated. Only then will the Love not be Blind. Two people can't possibly blindly walk together for life. It is a very conscious effort to understand, give and take, nurture and compliment each other for a more fulfilling life.

Thanks Sam! Another wonderful blog. And I like that post by Jan as well on the meaning of wedding rings.

Sam Chan said...

Hi WaterLearner,

I am glad that you find this post appropriate for you.

I totally agree with you, marriage is a choice to last a life time.

Indeed, understanding and love must compliment one another. Having understanding without love or having love without understanding is not great at all!

The happiest moment with one's future generation (children and grandchildren) will be to celebrate with them the longest marriage anniversary.

Thanks for adding your insightful views. I really value your participation.

I wishes you and your hubby a wonderful and lovely life together

surjit said...

"When the ego is dead is marriage true.."
A great post,Sam.Best wishes.

Sam Chan said...

Hi Surjit,

Very very true! One needs to sacrifice ego to build relationship in which two will then become one.

Thanks for adding your insightful views.

Best regards

WalksFarWoman said...

Thanks for directing me to this post Sam and giving me the opportunity to read so many other related posts that are equally as fascinating and uplifting.

Marriage is a wonderful topic to put under the microscope, there are many unions both conventional and unconventional that work for varying reasons but they can only be held together with love and respect. And I agree that you do fall in love many times with the same partner.

Glad you found yours Sam!

Sam Chan said...

Hi WalksFarWoman,

You are welcome and thank you for your compliment on my blog.

Well, I really hope every couples including you and your husband will continue to love one another forever!

Blessings to you my friend!

Doodski said...

Nice post Sam. I agree that it is how you deal with incompatibility that counts in marriage. Best wishes!

Sam Chan said...

Hi Doodski,

Thanks for your support! Let's continue to be faithful to our spouse so that everybody will agree that a happy marriage is achievable! Indeed it is just a matter of how one deal with incompatibility that counts in marriage.

Blessings to you and yours

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