The Art of Listening

Listen to everyone
Listen to those who love you and those who don't; to those who bore you; even to your enemies. It work a small miracle, and perhaps a great one.

Listen to what hasn't been said
Listen to what has been said, and especially to the unspoken - therein lie nuggets of truth and beauty.

Listen to your inner self
Learn to listen to the whispers of your heart and your soul; of what's right and what's not. You know so much more than you give yourself credit for.

Listen more than you speak
The less we speak, the more we listen. The more we listen , the more we learn.

Listen without interrupting
It takes courage to stand up and speak, and even more courage to sit down and listen.

Listen with absolute patience
Words don't come easily to everyone. Yet each person has something to say. So keep on listening and be rewarded with words of wisdom.

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Get Wisdom! Get Understanding!

“It is better to listen in order to understand than to listen in order to reply”

"When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or our family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and argument. That is my experience. If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change." - Thich Nhat Hahn

“There is a great difference between knowing and understanding: you can know a lot about something and not really understand it” - Charles F. Kettering

“To realize that you do not understand is a virtue; Not to realize that you do not understand is a defect.” - Lao Tzu

Philip Wheelwright is right!, "Much learning does not teach understanding."

There is a Chinese Proverb that says: “Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand.” and Confucius says “I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.” Thus, we can understand better by getting involve and do the necessary things!

Proverbs 4:5-7 Get wisdom! Get understanding! Do not forget, nor turn away from the words of my mouth. Do not forsake her, and she will preserve you; Love her, and she will keep you. Wisdom is the principal thing; Therefore get wisdom. And in all your getting, get understanding.

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Listen with your Hands, Mind and Eyes

Listen with your hands
When you take note, you experience everything twice, and understand it a thousand times better.

Listen with your mind
Even after a conversation, it pays to think about it. Indeed listening without reflecting is like eating without digesting.

Listen with your eyes
There is a road from the eye to the heart and mind that does not go through the ears.

Listen with 100% attention
When you focus all your senses to the task of listening, you'll be able to pick up little nuances that can make all the difference.

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Hear or Listen? - Listen with your ears

Most of us just hear and do not listen.

When someone really listens to you, bridges are built, and chasms are crossed.

Give someone the true gift of listening. After all, why lend a listening ear when you can afford two? Just listen. There's music to all things, if we had the ears for it.

"Know how to listen, and you will profit even from those who talk badly." - Plutarch

External References:

• Art of Listening
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Silence is Golden

At times, we need to calm down and keep our mouth shut.

Albert Einstein said "If A equals success, then the formula is A equals X plus Y and Z, with X being work, Y play, and Z keeping your mouth shut.”

Mark Twain said “It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.”

The best answer to anger is silence. Even a fish wouldn't get into trouble if he'd keep his mouth shut!

The bible tells us in James 3:2-6 (NIV) that "We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check. When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell."

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Cherish your friends

"In prosperity, our friends know us; in adversity, we know our friends." - John Churton Collins

"A true friend sticks with you through thick and thin no matter what."

"A true friend is someone who knows there's something wrong even when you have the biggest smile on your face."

"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."

"Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say."

"True friendship is like sound health, the value of it is seldom known until it is lost." - Charles Caleb Colton

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Remember to put on your thinking cap

"If everyone is thinking alike, someone isn't thinking." - George Patton

“A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes.” - Mahatma Gandhi

“When I get ready to talk to people, I spend two thirds of the time thinking what they want to hear and one third thinking about what I want to say.” - Abraham Lincoln

“Many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.” - William James

"Few people think more than two or three times a year; I have made an international reputation for myself by thinking once a week." - George Bernard Shaw

“A man who does not think for himself does not think at all.” - Oscar Wilde

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Why is Language Important?

“Language is the dress of thought.” - Samuel Johnson

"A different language is a different vision of life." - Federico Fellini

“Change your language and you change your thoughts.” - Karl Albrecht

“Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.” - Benjamin Lee Whorf

"It's not what you tell them…it's what they hear." - Red Auerbach

"Language is the roadmap of a culture. It tells you where its people came from and where they are going." - Rita Mae Brown

How many languages do you speak?

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How smart are you?

To outperform someone else - even if that person is "smarter" than you - is to increase your own Mental Performance Ratio - the percentage of your total mental capacity that you are putting to use.

"A man can learn only two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people." - Will Rogers

"Smart men put up with small annoyances, to gain larger rewards later."

Worker smarter, not just harder!

"The harder and smarter we work, the luckier we get - and the more we live."

"It's never smart to act better or wiser than those around us."

"A mark of a smart employer: he hires men smarter than himself."

"I make progress by having people around me who are smarter than I am and listening to them. And I assume that everyone is smarter about something than I am." - Henry J. Kaiser

"Heed woman. They're smarter than men. They know less, but understand more." - Anonymous

What do you think?

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Read and Think

"Ink is the transcript of thought."

"A drop of ink may make a million think." - Lord Byron

"If you've learned to read, you can learn to succeed."

"We learn to read so that we can read to learn."

“Today a reader, tomorrow a leader.” - Margaret Fuller

“Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.” - Joseph Addison

"Reading without thinking is like eating without digesting."

"Force yourself to reflect on what you read, paragraph by paragraph." - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

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Learn by paying attention

Learn something new everyday. Luck is when opportunity knocks - and you answer. Make sure you are listening.

Prosperity belongs to those who learn new things fastest. - Paul Zane Pilzer

“What most people need to learn in life is how to love people and use things instead of using people and loving things.”

“Mistakes show us what we need to learn.” - Peter McWilliams

You learn something every day if you pay attention. - Ray LeBlond

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Good Communication Skill

The ability to speak is a short cut to distinction.

Studies have shown that only 7% of what is communicated between people is transmitted through the WORDS themselves. 38% comes through the TONE of voice. 55% of communication, the largest part is the result of physiology or body language.

“First learn the meaning of what you say, and then speak.” - Epictetus

A wise man speaks when others have exhausted their words. If you do not know how to speak, better learn how to keep quiet.

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Effective Learning

Learning how to learn is life's most important skill.

Those who don't read good books have no advantage over those who can't.

It is true that we learn by listening, yet we don't listen. All experiences are opportunities for us to learn and grow. We learn more when we teach.

When we acquire knowledge only intellectually, we will never learn. We can learn only by doing. Learn from the past to improve the future. It is better to learn from the experience of others.

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I'd rather not to speak

It ain't what you say, it's the way that you say it - that's what get results. Mouth is 10%; eyes is 20%; head is 30% and heart is 40%!

Sharp dagger only wounds the flesh, but a sharp tongue can wound the spirit.

A slip of the foot, you'll soon recover; a slip of the tongue may last forever.

How many of us have realized that since we were given two ears and one mouth it might be that we were intended to listen twice as much as we speak.

We all can get into trouble if we do not know how to tame our tongue.

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Learn like Children

Children are naturally curious. They believe parents and teachers know a lot about the world. Asking questions and listening to answers are vital to their learning. You know children are growing up when they start asking questions that have answers.

Children require guidance and sympathy far more than instruction - Annie Sullivan.

You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance - Franklin P. Jones

If we ask a better question, we will come up with a better answer and therefore, a better result - What do you think?